The Finish Line

This appears to be a recurring pattern that I've started to become more aware of in my life. whenever a challenge arises where I need to step up, endure, be challenged, grow, learn, fight, fall, fail, rinse and repeat, I can accept the challenge and there is a lot of self-motivation involved in helping me get through each day with eagerness and willingness to face up to any obstacle. but as i approach the finish line, just as it is in plain view ahead of me, it is suddenly my feet are equipped with 100 lb weights and the last few paces are immensely difficult, each step requires so much effort.

this happens in a physical sense when I'm running, say, a 10 km run. I start off strong, i'm pumped and ready to go and then the last few km seem like they take forever and each step feels like it'll be my absolute last one.

this happens at work when approaching the deadline to a project. Sometimes I just need to focus on the task at hand and finish it off but sometimes, something that should take one hour can end up taking two or more -- even with the pressures of a deadline my productivity drops.

i started off in beijing with loads of energy. i woke up early, there was energy in my pace and i absorbed everything in and it seemed like the month would go by quickly. in many ways it has, but i feel like this last week has dragged on - each day feels like a week. i'm completely drained and barely have energy to make it through a day of work!

So why does this happen? i don't know!!

All i know is that i wish i could finish the race strong, that i could run all the way to the finish line as if i am running to win a prize. rather than seeing the finish line and thinking i can ease up now and take it easy the rest of the way.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.
1 Corinthians 9 : 24